Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Woah. I am a terrible blogger.

OK, so it's been like FOR-EVER, EVER, EVER (sorry, totally just had a Taylor Swift moment) since I wrote in this thing. I don't know why I don't keep up with this blog very well? I start off with the best of intentions (much like with my diet and exercise) and then fall off the bloggin' wagon.

I'm not sure where to start...uhh pick up at. I mean I was going to do this journey of his life so far, but I can't remember half of the milestones. Mother of the year, right here. :/

So let's just start with where we are now or semi-now (I can back up a few months).

The past few months have FLOWN by. Zaden is now 10 months! Can you believe that? I so can't. Everyone said it would go by so fast and that we should cherish every moment. Part of that is SO true. I mean the time going by so fast is an understatement. The cherish every moment part...ummm...how about cherish MOST moments? I don't miss the waking up every 2 to 3 hours and I don't miss the spit up. I do miss him being so tiny that he fit so perfect in my arms. I miss his little new born outfits and the small little baby coo's that he would make. Oh and I definitely miss the many naps a day he would take! Haha! I look back at pictures and can't believe how much he has changed and grown. The best thing though is he is starting to LOOK like Gerald and I! He is the black version of us and I LOVE it. :)

He is the funniest most smiliest most happy baby on the planet. He is also the most stubborn and independent. He is perfectly, Zaden. I never imagined the amount of joy he would bring to our lives and others. He truly makes everyone he comes in contact with smile. That blesses me so much. I prayed for a healthy, happy and beautiful baby. (OK, I realize that some of that was selfish and a little shallow...however I tried so long to have a baby that I figured if God would allow it, I would be a little picky with my prayers.) He totally answered them! Gerald said that's what took so long! Haha! But Zaden was SOOO worth it. Every single broken heart. Every single tear. Every single loss. Every single year that went by. He was SO worth it. It's funny, Gerald and I spent 9 years with out him and now we can't even remember what life was like before him. Funny how that works.

This Christmas season was AMAZING. I was so looking forward to this Christmas because last year was so heartbreaking. As you know the week before Christmas we were going to adopt a little girl. We were so ready for her. The day before we were to drive to Amarillo to get her, her father stepped up and chose to parent. A bittersweet moment for sure. I mean obviously it was bitter because our hearts were broken. We want to be parents so bad. Sweet because her father wanted to parent. It's so rare when the father steps in, so kudos to him. So Christmas 2011, I stood in my parents kitchen cutting up potatoes and sobbing tears of pure sadness. I had envisioned this amazing Christmas with our precious baby and in reality we were celebrating empty handed. Ugh. I threw myself many a pity parties for sure. I even quit my job because I couldn't stand to go back to the high school and be my happy cheerful self for all the students and staff. I just didn't have it in me. So I quit. I sat around and moped and moped and moped. Then I thought "I need to get over myself and get some dang help!" Therapy...here I come! I found a great Christian counselor because I wanted someone who shared in my beliefs and who would help me really go to God. I went for about 6 weeks, I think? Maybe it was only 4? You know what, I think it was! Yup, I only saw her 4 times. She really helped me snap out of it and then God did all the rest! He is so amazing isn't He?

OK, back to Christmas. This year was full of JOY! Pure joy! Ahhhh. This year we were parents!! This year we had a little boy to read the Christmas story to and to buy presents for! We have a wonderful tradition that we started with Zaden. He will only receive 3 presents from us at Christmas, just as Jesus only received 3. (gold frankincense and myrrh) We have only celebrated one Christmas as parents and I already LOVE our 3 gift rule. It's amazing because I don't have to run around like a maniac purchasing entire stores. Believe me I would actually love purchasing entire stores. But we don't have the funds and I don't want to raise a spoiled brat. So really not only does this tradition save us from raising a hell-yun (yeah I think I just made up my own spelling) but it also saves mommy from turning into a big spender with little pockets (and I am no mathematician, trust me I can barely figure out the tip on our dining bill, but I do know that big spending with little pockets doesn't go well together). I do not want to have to go sell plasma to save for Christmas presents. Catch ma drift, yo? It really savors the meaning of Christmas and our children (yup we plan on adopting at least one more, a girl, totally going to be specific b/c with adoption you can and you better believe I am going to take advantage of that) will ALWAYS know what to expect from us. Let the Grandparents and Aunt and Uncles go crazy if they want. :)

So, we now have a 10 month old. I am already starting to plan his 1st birthday. Tear. I can't believe that. We are going to have a Cheerio's themed birthday! I couldn't be more excited. Cheerio's are like his favorite food. Pinterest is SO my friend. Like it really is. It has helped me become and better wife and mother. I love Pinterest. I want to pin all the things! It gives me such confidence that I can do things I never thought possible, like cooking dinner! And a GOOD one. That was such an issue for such a long time. That issue is now non-existant. Thank you, Pinterest. I love you, Pinterest. You're the best friend I ever had, Pinterest.

I have writing ADD if you haven't noticed. I just go off on a tangent that has nothing to do about anything. And with that, I am done. I have no more to say. I lost all my train of thought. But it's not all my fault. It's Zaden's. I know I am blaming my sweet child, but it's true. Basically b/c I am tired and have been writing this blog for over 24 hours. Well not consistently because that would just be crazy and dumb. So, in the middle of this thing my son proceeded to throw up continuously for like 5 minutes. So weird. He has never done that before. No fever or anything and he seems to be fine now. Maybe he had a little tummy bug.? Maybe it was the 2nd half of the flu shot that he had earlier? (even though the first half didn't affect him. Oh can I just add that Z is a CHAMP when it comes to shots? He doesn't even cry! He does let out a quick "owww" type sound but that's it.) Or maybe he ate something off the floor he shouldn't have. I am constantly finding paper, leaves, dog food, cardboard and all other kinds of things in this child's mouth. He's too QUICK. I don't even know where he finds this stuff! I think like at LEAST once a day I have to stick my finger in his mouth and force whatever it is that he is chewing on, out. I swear I am watching him. He moves so fast and finds such small things. He has Superman vision or something. Oh the joys of motherhood. I love him. He is my world.

Wishing you JOY and lots of LAUGHTER,

No comments:

Post a Comment